Divorce can be one of the most painful experiences a person can endure. Our Heavenly Father hates divorce (Malachi 2:16) and desires to protect every marriage. However, human nature and circumstances can hinder a happy marriage, leading to divorce.
Even God Himself divorced Israel (Jeremiah 3:8), and many people find themselves divorced despite not choosing or deserving it. Marriage was designed by God as a safe space for love to flourish.
Jesus’ Encounter with the Woman at the Well
Jesus’ tender conversation with the woman at the well, who had gone through five divorces, demonstrates His compassion (John 4:16-18). He didn’t judge or call her an adulteress.
When We Face Divorce
When we become part of the divorce statistics, we may wonder: Are we free to seek happiness in another marriage, or does God only allow one chance?
Some quote scriptures like Matthew 19:3-9, Mark 10:1-12, and Luke 16:18, claiming God doesn’t allow remarriage or that remarrying constitutes adultery. Is this Jesus’ intention – to limit us to one try – or is His heart to protect both the woman and man?
The International Standard Bible Encyclopedia (ISBE) says this about divorce1:
This expression, found in De 24:1,3; Isa 50:1; Jer 3:8 is the translation of the Hebrew ‘cepher kerithuth‘. The two words, literally rendered, signify a document or book of cutting off, i.e. a certificate of divorce given by a husband to a wife, so as to afford her the opportunity or privilege of marrying another man.
Deuteronomy 24:1-4 outlines the legal process for divorce, emphasizing the protection of the wife:
“When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce [sepher kerithuth], puts it in her hand, and sends her out [shalach] of his house, when she has departed from his house, and goes and becomes another man’s wife, if the latter husband detests her and writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her as his wife, then her former husband who divorced her must not take her back to be his wife after she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the Lord, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance.” Deut 24:1-4
Notice that the Torah forbids remarrying the first husband, not remarriage itself.
“Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces[Apoluo] his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’[Apostasion] But I say to you that whoever divorces[Apoluo] his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced[Apoluo] commits adultery.” Matt 5:31-32
“The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce[Apoluo] his wife for just any reason?” And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. ”They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce[Apostasion], and to put her away[Apoluo]? ”He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce[Apoluo] your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces[Apoluo] his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced[Apoluo] commits adultery.” Matt 19:3-9
Greek Words for Divorce
Two distinct Greek words are used:
- “Apoluo” (send away, dismiss, release)
- “Apostasion” (bill of divorce, certificate of divorce)
Jesus’ Response
Jesus addressed the Pharisees’ question about divorce, highlighting the importance of the certificate of divorce (Matthew 19:3-9). He wasn’t disagreeing with the Torah but rather addressing the issue of men sending away their wives without proper certification.
The Consequences of No Certificate
In Jewish culture, a woman without a certificate of divorce was considered “Agunah” (anchored or chained), unable to remarry. Any child she had, from her new husband, would be considered illegitimate.
Jesus taught that a man cannot simply send away his wife without providing a certificate of divorce, causing her to be considered an adulteress if she remarried.
Clarification from Luke 16:18
Now the passage in Luke 16:18 seems a bit clearer as it refers only to “sending away” (Apoluo), not issuing a certificate of divorce. This distinction highlights Jesus’ concern for protecting the woman’s rights:
“Everyone putting away[Apoluo] his wife and marrying another commits adultery. And everyone marrying her who is put away[Apoluo] from her husband commits adultery.”
- Ref The International Standard Bible Encyclopedia (ISBE) Divorcement, Bill of: see https://www.internationalstandardbible.com/D/divorce-in-the-old-testament.html
